What’s up friends? I hope that all of you are feeling as good as I am feeling today. Seriously. I got so much sleep last night that when I didn’t get up until 6:15am I didn’t even feel guilty because I knew I had enough energy to crush the rest of today. (And today has been supremely crushed.) These last 5 weeks have truly been something else. I haven’t had an episode in this time, I’ve been sleeping better than in the last 12 months, and I lost a few pounds – not that I needed it, but it’s still nice when it happens.
But I don’t want to give a full review of my anxiety experiment yet. I share this so I can show that things are going very well in my world. Back in December, when I bought my domain and started laying the groundwork for this blog, I was taking a bit of a wild chance. I needed an outlet for myself. At the time I hadn’t nailed down everything that was going on with my body, but one thing I did know what that I needed a creative outlet that took me beyond my home and the girls. Plus, it was the middle of winter and that is always when I am craving a creative outlet.
I didn’t have a handle on any of my responsibilities at the time. Creating this website and the demand it put on my time forced me to get the rest of my world in check. I have been really pleased with how it’s gone too. But I’ve hit a bit of a sticky spot. For one, it is getting hard to come up with 2 blog posts a week. Like, really hard. I don’t know how professionals do this full time – but then, I suppose they can afford babysitters. But also, I am still struggling a bit with that balance between mother and creator (though I don’t know any woman who has overcome this struggle). I’m back on Instagram now and while it hasn’t become a problem, it does still require a lot of time in order to grow. If I told you I was there purely for pleasure I would be lying. While I do enjoy parts of the platform, I am absolutely using it to promote myself, my patterns, and my blog.
On the motherhood front, as my girls are growing, they are requiring different things from me. I am finding that when they are younger it is easier to pivot and meet those needs, but Lydia is turning 4 in a couple months. She is starting to need a lot more of my attention; cuddles while mommy types are not cutting it anymore. I am sensing a bit of a pinch point where the test of the type of parent I aspire to be vs. the type of parent I really am begins. I am quite sure that the choices I make now will lay the foundation for the choices I make later on.
Therefore, I have decided to take a 2-week break. I am going dark on all social media. No new blog posts, IG posts, nothing. I want to take some time to first, take a creative breather. But also, I need space in this particular pivot in meeting my kids needs. This won’t be a completely work free pivot! I am going to be coming up with some new patterns and intend to release a brand new one upon my return. (It’s almost done and it’s super cute.)
As well, I’ll be playing with some ideas for themes for blog posts. Yes, there will still be plenty of gardening, but I can only write so much about my seedlings and plants. I like the idea of having more of a series style of writing. Let’s say I come back and say we are going to spend 2 weeks on herbalism? Then 2 weeks on homemaking stuff? Then gardening? Who knows where I’ll go. I do feel some trepidation because there is nothing like writing a blog post that no one likes. I feel that there is some pressure to “niche down” and stay within a certain lane. But guys, if you know me personally you know that I am a woman of many hobbies and interests. I chose the name of my website a year before I bought it because it was so appropriate to who I am. Sarah Mae Keeps Busy because Sarah Mae has too many idea’s. So we’ll see. Just hang tight for a couple of weeks and I’ll be back swinging.
Love you all.
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